I said to my husband that this week's prompt was CRAFT, and he replied "Can't remember a fricken thing?"
I had been thinking about talents when I first saw the prompt. I was wondering who I would feature that had skills in the arts/crafts, or was a skilled tradesman, or maybe I had a brewmaster in my tree.
With that comment - PLOT TWIST!
Alzheimer's and Dementia runs in my family. There is nothing like humour to assist in coping with all things scary. This type of black humour is what gets me through the sense of panic when I think about all of the inheritable things lurking in my family tree.
CRAFT DISEASE - Can't Remember A Fricken Thing (Alzheimer's) is the one that scares me the most.
When I first began genealogy researching I had thought about finding the people in my family tree. I hadn't thought about how many inheritable diseases I would see on medical and death records.
I have not done a medical DNA test. I have only done the Ancestry shared matches DNA. I don't want to know what lurks in my genetic code. Just because the marker is there doesn't mean I will get it. Knowing in advance won't change the outcome.
When I was a teenager my great grandfather began behaving a bit strange. It wasn't very obvious at first, and he was very good at covering things up. As the years went by it became worse. In my early 20s I stopped by his care home twice a week to visit. When I arrived he knew I belonged to him somehow because I was there so frequently, but he didn't know who I was.
One time I took him down a floor for an event happening. He was a bit agitated going into the elevator since he rarely left his floor. When we arrived downstairs there was a large crowd, but soon he settled into enjoying the music. He asked me who I was. I told him that I was his granddaughter Debbie. He replied that I was lying because Debbie was only this tall as he held his hand about 2 1/2 feet off the floor. I continued to try to convince him I had grown up. He got upset, asked me what exactly I wanted from him, and then tried to punch me. I managed to settle him down, and take him back upstairs.
After that I always told him my name was Deb, and that I was a family friend. He accepted that.
Ernest Elmer Bayes was nicknamed Hap because of how happy he was during childhood straight through to adulthood. He was an amazing Great Grandpa through my childhood. My mom told me wonderful stories about her experience growing up with him as her grandfather. Grandma told fantastic stories about what an amazing dad he was while she and her brother were growing up.
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| My great grandparents Ernest & Rose (nee Dendy) Bayes and their children, my grandmother and her brother |
The day before he died I stopped to see him in hospital. He knew exactly who I was. The gift of clarity for that one day before his death was priceless.
“The mind forgets, but the heart will always remember.
And what is the heart's memory but love itself?”
And what is the heart's memory but love itself?”
~ Twan Eng Tan, The Gift of Rain
Collect the memories before it's too late!
This is why I search -
Cause ...
You can pick your friends, but you can't pick your family you know!
***Any errors are my own. Please send me any updates or corrections via the comments at the bottom of this blog post***
Sources:
Tan, Twan Eng (2009). The gift of rain. New York, NY, Weinstein Books.
Links:
Amy Johnson Crow, 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks Challenge
https://www.amyjohnsoncrow.com/
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