52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks 2023: Week 19 (BALD)
When we were expecting our first child we talked about many things, but we never talked about hair.
We talked about gender.
I was fairly confident we were having a boy.
Chris had no feelings either way.
We had our first in a time & place when finding out the gender wasn't available.
We talked about names.
Cassie or Emma if we had a girl.
We decided on the boys' name complete with middle by about the 6th week of pregnancy, and never wavered.
We talked about parenting styles along with hopes & dreams.
We never realized our imaginary children were not our real children.
We never talked about who the baby might look like.
We never talked about features or hair colour.
I had been picturing our baby (a son in my visions) as a blonde cue ball for the entire pregnancy.
All of the babies that I recall being born in my family have been born bald so I was shocked when they wheeled me off the elevator from the recovery room after an emergency c-section (general anesthetic) to see this baby with a head of thick black hair.
Had I been awake when he was born I would have known he was mine, but there was no time for a spinal.
My first visual of our baby was Chris holding him while leaning against the wall in the hallway of the maternity ward. I was shocked to see a full head of dark hair. I immediately thought they gave him the wrong baby. I then noticed Chris looking down at the baby and thought 'oh no...he's already attached'.
I couldn't quite understand how my blonde cue ball baby turned into this baby with thick dark hair.
I would like to believe it was the result of: the anesthetic, lack of sleep, or 2 days of labour. Regardless of why - I was confident they gave us the wrong baby.
Don't get me wrong - I loved him from the first moment, and was solidly attached instantly. He was so darn cute, and such an amazing baby.
BUT I kept looking at the blonde cue ball baby in the bassinet across from the one they said was mine wondering if he was mine.
By the time we were discharged to home several days later due to my surgery and his jaundice I had forgotten that I hadn't been sure he was our baby.
It probably helped that he had a bump on his ear that matched his dad perfectly, and I had also realized our families have equal amounts of both blonde and dark hair - just a random set of genetics that results in a baby.
If only I had seen a baby photo of Chris I may have been ready for a dark haired child because as newborns both our boys looked just like their dad.
Many years later we were at a community gathering where that blonde cue ball baby in the bassinet across from us was also in attendance. In my most judgy voice I said to Chris 'It doesn't matter - I do not want that child - this one is mine!".
By the time he was a year old he looked so much like me there was little doubt he was mine.
By the time our second arrived I fully expected all the dark hair he was born with. When our boys were about 2 and 5 a coworker commented that I got Pete & Re-Pete.
Being a new parent is exhausting....
This is why I search -
Cause ...
You can pick your friends, but you can't pick your family you know!
***Any errors are my own. Please send me any updates or corrections via the comments at the bottom of this blog post***
Photos:
Personal Family Photos
Links:
Amy Johnson Crow, 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks Challenge
https://www.amyjohnsoncrow.com/52-ancestors-in-52-weeks/
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