52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks: Week 21 (Military)
This week's prompt MILITARY gave me lots of family members to choose from.
My husband's family has a strong United Empire Loyalist (UEL) history including being related to James Secord. James was married to Laura (nee Ingersoll) Secord who was a Battle of 1812 heroine. I haven't yet found a connection for his family to General Lee, but I know it's pending. There are historical military sites in Ontario that bear his family name. I am a 'base brat' who was born on an air force base, and began school on an army base. My great grandfather died while on duty as a guard at the Kananaskis Prisoner of War Camp during World War 2. He served for England in World War I. My grandfather who's mystery I haven't yet fully solved received a Canadian Military pension that my grandmother received as his widow after his death (in his assumed name). Just 2 weeks apart my X2 great grandfather lost his son & brother in WWI France's BATTLE OF THE SOMME with the 50th Canadian Battalion.2 My step-dad's father was a Belgian Prisoner of War during World War II, and I grew up seeing the swastika stamped release papers on the wall in our dining room. This list could keep going, but I think it's pretty clear I was faced with a challenge on who to feature for Blog Week #21 (MILITARY).
After a lot of debate I decided to feature my grandfather John Robert Graham who was known as Jack/Jacky. I never met Jack because he left the family before I was born. I grew up hearing stories about his grand (and not always responsible) adventures. He didn't stay in contact with his children after the divorce. My mother (his first born child) was named for him ~ Jacki-Roberta Graham. Jack was only 19 years old when my mom was born. Since mom was the oldest she had a lot of memories and attachments to her dad. He briefly returned to the family to walk her down the aisle when she married my dad in 1967.
My husband's family has a strong United Empire Loyalist (UEL) history including being related to James Secord. James was married to Laura (nee Ingersoll) Secord who was a Battle of 1812 heroine. I haven't yet found a connection for his family to General Lee, but I know it's pending. There are historical military sites in Ontario that bear his family name. I am a 'base brat' who was born on an air force base, and began school on an army base. My great grandfather died while on duty as a guard at the Kananaskis Prisoner of War Camp during World War 2. He served for England in World War I. My grandfather who's mystery I haven't yet fully solved received a Canadian Military pension that my grandmother received as his widow after his death (in his assumed name). Just 2 weeks apart my X2 great grandfather lost his son & brother in WWI France's BATTLE OF THE SOMME with the 50th Canadian Battalion.2 My step-dad's father was a Belgian Prisoner of War during World War II, and I grew up seeing the swastika stamped release papers on the wall in our dining room. This list could keep going, but I think it's pretty clear I was faced with a challenge on who to feature for Blog Week #21 (MILITARY).
After a lot of debate I decided to feature my grandfather John Robert Graham who was known as Jack/Jacky. I never met Jack because he left the family before I was born. I grew up hearing stories about his grand (and not always responsible) adventures. He didn't stay in contact with his children after the divorce. My mother (his first born child) was named for him ~ Jacki-Roberta Graham. Jack was only 19 years old when my mom was born. Since mom was the oldest she had a lot of memories and attachments to her dad. He briefly returned to the family to walk her down the aisle when she married my dad in 1967.
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| John Robert (Jack) Graham with daughter Jacki-Roberta on her wedding day, 1967 |
Mom once said to me that she just couldn't understand how he could walk away from his children, and not look back. It made her sad. Jack had an alcohol problem. Jack's mother Nellie remained connected to mom and her siblings & their families. She visited them often, and spoke with them regularly. Nellie's relationship with Jack's family wasn't without issue because she too had issues with alcohol. For mom her father was a missing piece in her life. She and her siblings grew up healthy and happy. Grandma raised her kids as a single mother, supported them working as a telephone operator, did not consume alcohol, and never remarried.
I seem to have gotten side tracked. Rather than starting over I will go back to the beginning, and introduce Jack.
John Robert Graham who was known as Jack and Jacky was born on the 7th of March 1930 in Winnipeg Manitoba. His parents were Robert Graham who was known as Bob/Bobby, and Nellie May Cannon. Jack passed away August 5th 2011 in Vancouver, British Columbia. My mother and some of her siblings had last seen him in September 1984 when they visited their grandma who was dying. Jack was at the hospital visiting his mother at the time of their arrival. The reunion was not celebratory.
With the assistance of Ancestry DNA I have been able to track back to my 5th great grandparents on the Graham line before I hit my brick wall of Peter Graham & Ann(e) Kirk.
John Robert Graham who was known as Jack and Jacky was born on the 7th of March 1930 in Winnipeg Manitoba. His parents were Robert Graham who was known as Bob/Bobby, and Nellie May Cannon. Jack passed away August 5th 2011 in Vancouver, British Columbia. My mother and some of her siblings had last seen him in September 1984 when they visited their grandma who was dying. Jack was at the hospital visiting his mother at the time of their arrival. The reunion was not celebratory.
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| Jack (John Robert) Graham played the accordion, but not the bagpipes likes his father did |
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| Jack (John Robert) Graham and his grandfather Jack (Con)Cannon, Nellie's father |
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| Jack (John Robert) Graham and his dad, Bob/Bobby (Robert) Graham |
With the assistance of Ancestry DNA I have been able to track back to my 5th great grandparents on the Graham line before I hit my brick wall of Peter Graham & Ann(e) Kirk.
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| Jack in the upper left in his Navy uniform with his mother (Nellie) to his left |
Jack was in the Navy, and traveled the world. He served on HMCS (Her Majesty's Canadian Ship) BONAVENTURE. My dad was in Cyprus on peace keeping duties in 1965. He told me that in 1964 BONAVENTURE ferried all the equipment the Army used in Cyprus. There is a good possibility that my grandpa Jack was part of the crew that brought the very equipment my dad was using in Cyprus. 1
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| Jack (John Robert) Graham in England with the Navy stopped to see his uncle Douglas Graham & cousins Dougie and Georgie |
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| Jack (John Robert) Graham in uniform |
Jack married my grandmother (details private as she is still living) in 1949.
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| Jack (John Robert) Graham & my grandma, on their wedding day |
They went on to have 6 children. My mom remembered that when he was home he was a connected dad. He loved spending time with his wife and children. As the years went by he began spending more and more time away. My aunt shared with me this story that she remembered about her dad:
"Once he and Mom decided they were going to go away camping just the two of them. They left with the station wagon all packed up, and everyone waved goodbye. We were staying the weekend at home with Nanny. A couple of hours later they were back. Dad insisted on coming and getting all of us including Nanny & the dog. That was the end of their alone time. He was a hands-on Dad and when he was home he loved spending time with his kids. He was proud of us, and would drag us out of bed to show us off to his friends when they had their house parties."
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| Jack (John Robert) with my grandma, and their oldest 4 |
My mother was their oldest, and passed away in 2015. All of her siblings are happy and healthy.
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| Jack with my grandma and my mom (their first born child) |
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| Jack with my grandma and my mom (their first born child) |
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| Jack with my mom, Jacki (his oldest child) |
Jack was a diver for the Canadian Military, and he took my mom scuba diving when she was small. I heard many times during my growing up about how fun it had been to go deep sea diving with her dad. Jack probably ignited the travel bug that followed my mom through to her adulthood. Jack was stationed in Halifax & Victoria, and the family moved around with him.
Before (and after) joining the Navy Jack held many different jobs. When my mom was a baby he drove a dump truck for a time. When the family was moving to another residence in Winnipeg, Manitoba they loaded all their furnishings and possessions into the dump truck. Grandma tells this story explaining that my mom while seated on Grandma's knee reached out and pushed the DUMP button while they were stopped at a red light. Jack calmly reversed the dumping action just in time to avoid crisis. Can you imagine all their furniture dumped out right there on Portage Ave in downtown Winnipeg, Manitoba.
After grandma and grandpa Jack separated he went on to remarry and have another family. I believe he lost touch with his Graham relatives as well. When I found the living Grahams the wife of Jack's cousin messaged me that 'sadly Jacky passed young'. I corrected her, and provided a link to Jack's death announcement.
In later years Jack was a bus driver for the City of Vancouver transit system. In my early 20s I lived in Vancouver, and rode the bus. Every time I got on a bus with a male driver I would try to figure out if we shared any similar features. Never was I brave enough to approach any I thought might have been Grandpa Jack. I regret that now.
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| Jack (John Robert) Graham on his wedding day to his second wife photo provided to Jack's children by his mother Nellie |
I would like to believe that mom got her sense of adventure from the dad that she loved & lost.
This is why I search -
Cause ...
You can pick your friends, but you can't pick your family you know!
***Any errors are my own. Please send me any updates or corrections via the comments at the bottom of this blog post***
Sources:
1 Canada's Rich History, Retrieved May 24th 2019 from
http://www.sevenyearproject.com/canadas-rich-history-bonaventure.html
2 The 50th Battalion on the frontlines of history, Amundson, and Paulina Liwski, July 30, 2014, Retrieved May 25th 2019 from
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